Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Weight loss

Lately I have been on a bit a of a health kick, trying to lose some of the weight I have gained as a result of 4 pregnancies and poor diet.

But while thinking about my physical health it has lead me to think about my spiritual health as well.

When your on a diet every pound off is like a mini mile stone and you can quickly become discouraged if you are not losing massive amounts at a time. You want results quickly and it not be hard work.

I feel I'm a bit like that spiritually. I want God to change me instantly and help me lose the extra spiritual baggage, I've spent years building up. Those sins I've embedded so deep in my heart. I want Him to make it easy and me not to have to work for change, I don't want to give up things I love but still want the change. A bit like wanting to lose weight whilst still enjoying large quantities of chocolate, cakes and crisps etc..

This time round I have taken a more relaxed approach to my weight lose, as I am breast feeding our son Elijah, I don't expect to lose massive amounts of weight quickly (as that would upset my milk supply, thus affecting his feeding) I am happy slowly plodding along, with the opinion every pound or half pound off is better than gaining it and those small amounts will equal bigger ones added together.

I suddenly though that maybe I should take this approach with my spiritual growth, the Bible talks a lot esp in Paul's letters about running the race, keeping on in the faith, enduring to the end. Its not always about radical change and instant results. Christ is changing me day by day making me more like Him. So instead of being dishearten that I am always making mistakes and am not growing or getting anywhere. I am thinking long term, that slowly through every day life and everyday encounters and experiences God is making me more like His Son. That's what I want, to be like Him, not like me.

I know we (I) can come to God and He will take all that baggage away, but we (I) so often pick it up again and take it with us (me). Guilt is a big problem for me! When Jesus died He didn't just take my sin He took the guilt attached to it as well. I so often take my sins to Him confess them and then take the guilt back with me.

I toil for days over one loss of temper, one unkind word, one thing I should have done but didn't esp where my kids are concerned. I shouldn't have made that promise to them, because I've broken it again! I shouldn't have said we could do this or go there and then not followed through. I compare myself to other mothers and see how well they are doing and think why can I not cope? But what I should be doing is comparing myself to Christ and trusting that if I let Him he will make me more like Him. Ultimately when I compare myself and others to Christ I find we all fall short. So we are all in the same boat. So I shouldn't feel guilty that others are better than me at being a mother, a better prayer, a better wife. I should be thankful that Christ loves me to much to leave me where I am and is helping me day by day (if I let Him) to be more like him.

"such a tiny offering (my life) compared to Cavalry, but never the less I lay it at your feet, all that is within me cries for You alone be glorified Emmanuel God with us" (Mercy Me all that is within) I added the my life part :-)

1 comment:

repentant sinner said...

I know exactly what you mean about the guilt. It is what stops me in my tracks most often is when i have sinned and despite praying for forgiveness and repenting i feel i am not good enough and that stops me from carrying on in my Christian walk. Keep going with your diet sexy we will both get down to our wedding weights yet x