Mission week! God is so great!

I have just had the most awesome church service in ages!! I can't wait til August when we are having a mission week, where we can invite our friends to loads of different events. It's gonna be fab. Lately I've been a little distracted from God but today has focused my attention right back where it should be.
I feel happy today and full of enthusiasm!
Can't wait til Stu gets home from work! I miss him when he's doing these long shifts and Sunday is usually our family day but every now and then he has to work them. I hate his new shift rota because it means he works long hours and the kids don't get to see him much. Hopefully when he qualifies that will all be behind us.
Anyway better go my assignment wont write itself!

STU SAYS THANKS PAULA!!!, CHARLIE GIRL!!!

Stuart would like to thnak you for my/his anniversary present Paula!
I read your blog Charlie am shocked that such language could come from you! I'm a bit sad thou that you feel like your not a Christian anymore...no lectures as its your life...but I feel sad. Paula thats another one for you!
Better go Noah is crying loads and Faith trying to climb out the window AGAIN!!!

THANK YOU CHARLIE!

She's wonderful she brought us a hamper she so cute!!!! Thank you babes, champagne, funny french things I cant spell cousants??, and real coffee, jam and maralade mmmm thanks babe that me with breakfast in bed tomorrow xxxx

3years at 3:00pm

Well folks today is our 3rd wedding anniversary, leather so I'm told, hate to think what Paula's getting me!!! (sorry that really should be us shouldn't it!??) My pal Charlie (seek link) also is great she, sent me (damm it us!) a txt, My mum remembered this year too yeah! Stu's mum is a star as usual and dinner tonight is on her. I can't believe I'm 27, been married for 3years, have two beautiful kids and a mortgage!!! It used to make me feel old! but now I just feel happy, loved and where I wanna be right now. So in all my course is going well, as is Stu's (he's training to be a lawyer, yeah soon we will be loaded, no more value food for us, yippee!) so our 5 year plan is going great so far.....
There's only two things wrong with my life first my Dad's not here and second my Nan's not here either. But I still have my fantastic Mum, my fabo best mates Paula and Charlie, a great husband, my wonderful kids and God. So life isn't that bad after all.

Mine now have titles, yey Paula

randomness yey!

Also just bought vast quantities of condoms ....not all for me like!

Silly silly girl!!!!

3 Years!


On wed 21st June, Stu and I will be celebrating our 3rd wedding anniversery! I'm amazed at how much has happened in the space of those 3 years. My Dad, my Nan, our cat, our baby and my Gall stones, all gone in such a short space of time. Two beauiful children and three years later here we are still in love, still together. I never thought this would ever happen to me but yey it did.

So this post is for Stu, thanks for putting up with me and all me moods, and pregnancy's (bet your glad to have your sexy lady back!) I look forward to many more years together. I love you loads big x's

Happy endings??? and randomness!!!


I've recently found myself questioning if I believe in the happily ever after. Do we like Cinderella find a Prince Charming and ride off in to the distance? Do we always have to look wonderful, without a hair out of place like so many celb's would lead us to believe? Or can we be happy with what the world would class as 2nd best or whatever you can get?

My thoughts are confused on the issue, as to what is perfection?? Does it need to be prefect for us to be happy? From my experiences, all relationships take work and effort... some days more than others... but if you have found someone who still loves when you are at your worst surely thats better than having a Brad Pitt look a like, who couldn't give a damm about you or how you feel.

When I was little all I wanted to do was to become a teacher, get married, have kids and be happy. But life isn't like disney would lead us to believe, you can't always be happy and I believe that its ok to feel sad and cry. Its ok when life isn't fabulous and everything isn't rosy. Life takes work just like any relationship.
I've been depressed and hopefully am comming out the other side now. So my conlusion is that happily ever after does work, just not like the movies and fairy tales make out it does. For some maybe they are lucky enough to have it all but for most of us, we should just learn to be content with what life has dealt us.
Look for the beauty around us like, our children, the natural world and our families. God has given us so much to be thankful for. I need to try and remember this!


Oh and for most, pregnancy makes us fat and hormonal, and our children make us tried and stressed, but its all worth it! My children are such a blessing, as is my husband (most days!).

Paula's comment on losing weight should be that she has none to lose in the first place! Mine is going well over a stone off now since Noah, slower than with Faith but I quiet sure that had a lot to do with the Gall stones and countless trips to A&E, throwing up, Morphine, and Pain... or that should be the Pain first then the Morphine...

Today is Father days so this post is dedicated to my Dad, who as you will know from previous posts is not here in this life anymore, here's to you Dad, I miss you and your the greatest!
To everyone else please don't take your parents for granted one day they wont be there anymore....

ITS SOOOOOOOOO HOT!!!!!!

Well the mad ozzie returner doesn't think so but I am sooooo hot. We all ran for shelter under the shade at sundays BBQ at the great Charlie's house but miss Oz stayed in the sun til she realised she was billy no mates. So she came inside too.

Anyway she's moaning about her job and the fact that she can't sit and drink tea with me anymore...which granted is a shame but at least she's earning now. I have offered to swap places but she's having none of it. I am surprised as she is sooo good with my kids. Watch out Alex she'll be after her own soon! (Paula no need to comment here I'll do it for you....Hell will freeze over before that happens...or along those lines)

Well best by off have a table and chairs to shop for...men give in so easy when they want something...or you have something they want....

I won!!!!

I got the bouncy castle for Faith and spent a whole morning blowing it up with a hand pump!!! But it was soooo worth it just to see her face.

HUMAN AGAIN

After months in fact years of being a baby/milk machine at last I am finally beginning to feel human again and resume my life as "normal". I think my husband is glad to have his wife back too. Although I love being a mum it does put an end to being yourself for a while. You become this whole other person and will remain that way until you die so I'm led to believe... they don't tell you that in all the baby manual's... if they ever make a manuel true to life, I think people would stop reproducing!!!

Anyway now my bestest bud is back I can look forward to nights out having fun again, that is when she is up and running again, Paula if your reading this get fixed so we can dance without you breaking he he big xxxx's

I will try my hardest not to let the fun I have with Paula and Charlie end up with baby number 3. As every time I let them take me out bad things happen. Well my children are not bad, but I would like to enjoy the ones I've got and enjoy being me for a while. So Stu if your reading this don't let me seduce you!

I am so far passing my new course and my degree is on track, have even applied to become a registered child minder, for next year so looking forward to that and my new kitchen yeah! Also have just managed to convince Stu to let me have new BBQ and table and chairs set with huge parasol for the summer, summer evenings here we come can't wait! Also will try talking him into (stu don't read this bit) new play house for Faith and Noah and a bouncy castle and ball pool for Faiths birthday in July! Will have to be nice to him for a while I think before he caves in hmmm (Paula stop reading it'll gross you out or is it too late for that???)

Anyway enough random withering will let you know if I get my own way.... normally do when its something for the kids have to work harder if its something for me......

I don't mind really cause as of now it official THE SEXY LADY IS BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tribute to an amazing man

Lately I have been thinking about my dad a lot! Probably the reason for my over emotional spaz yesterday(see post below)

You see I miss my dad so much, he isn't here to share jokes with his grand kids, or watch them grow and learn new skills. I feel like he just left me as my new married life was just beginning. The story is a deeply sad one, I'm not sure if I am completely ready to share yet but here goes... On November 18th 2003 my phone alarm went off to remind me it was my Dad's birthday, being pregnant with our first child and at that forgetful stage I hadn't posted his card. So I went out to post it and thought nothing of it for the rest of the day. I then received a phone call from my dad's, new wife's, friend asking for my mum's phone number which I though was strange but gave it to her and again forgot about it. Then at about 8pm I had a phone call from my mum telling me my dad was dead, he had killed himself. I remember screaming NO!, shaking, dropping the phone and Stu rushing down the stairs to see what had happened. After that its blurry! The next few days were awful, I couldn't eat or sleep properly which was doing our baby no favours. I was then told how he had walked out of work in the middle of the day, gone to a petrol station and filled his can up, walked about 5 miles out of town to a field where he poured the petrol onto himself and set it a light.
What a waste of a life, I get angry at him for what he did and for how stupid he was. Why didn't he ask for help? He had family around him who loved him very much. The hole he has left in my life will never be filled, the only source of comfort I have is in God and His word.
I can't watch films with people burning in them anymore, of which there are a few that were my favourites, including Aliens. I just think how awful it is to get to that state in your life, that you think its not worth living. I have been to that point and returned safely unharmed thank God, but why him and not me?... what was it inside me that stopped me from doing it but didn't stop him?.. I guess my questions will remain unanswered.

A concerned friend writes
Well she is finally home and we had a fantastic day yesterday watching Red dwarf, catching up, playing the kids and going to pizza hut. It was just like she'd never been away.
Although I feel a lot is going to change as she informed me this morning that she is getting married (I'm still not sure if she's joking or not yet watch this space) If however she is serious I am deeply concerned, as the guy she is marrying always manages to hurt her. I want her to be happy, truly I do and if this is the man she wants I'll stand by her. I just shed a tear this morning in the worry that she will get hurt again by him and that he will let her down again. I believe in second chances but I am torn between being a good friend and my own emotions. Maybe I'm being selfish slightly in not wanting him to part of her life because of the repercussions it may have on mine. He is best mates with my ex and that's a chapter I want left closed, seeing him again may bring up too many hurtful memories. But her happiness should not be neglected just because of my fears so if this is for real congratulations babes and I wish you good luck.......

(if however this is a joke....I hate you your mean!!!......)

SHE'S MEAN IT WAS ALL A HORRIDE SCARY JOKE!!! Still stand by the above comments though that I love her and am and will always be concerned about her.

P.S even Brad Pitt would not be good enough for my Paula!!!

4 DAYS 4 DAYS 4 DAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm so excited and I just cant hide it, I'm about to lose control and I think I like it OH YEAH!!!! erm hang on not quite but nearly. If you have ever read my blog before you will know what I am on about....for those who haven'tPAULA THE FABULOUS IS COMING HOME IN 4 DAYS!!!!!!! So I am very happy as we will being indulging in Pizza and Red Dwarf for a whole day, not sure what to do with the kids yet..... maybe will put them in a cupboard... well that was Paula's suggestion! I guess Faith will enjoy the Pizza not sure about RD but we shall see. Whatever happens my bestest bud to the entire world is coming home YIPPEE!!!

Ok in response to Miss Bell's comment on post below (2 down) She has finally set a date to return to the best country in the world! She is giving up on sunshine and sand, surfer "dudes" and beach babes and leaving behind the nightmare of killer spiders. She has come to her senses! She will be home 23rd May to rain, seagull poop, and returning to former space on my sofa (the indent is still just visible better put the kettle on too!) but with the new addition of baby sick, Faith's potty "expertise" and a friend who's slightly fatter than when she left.....babies!!! Chocolate cake.....more like! Oh and of course my other half is now in a different decade to us both so we can laugh merrily at him for at least 2yrs and 11months til I join him then the laughter must stop!
Anyway enough rambling SHES COMING HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Most terrifying experience of my life!!!!
It all started as just a concerned mother taking her 11wk old son to see health visitor, just "in case" I wasn't be one of those paranoid mothers, turns out I was right to go. She referred me to the doctors where even though my HV had rang and asked that they see me straight away I had to wait for 30mins, anyway the doctor then sent me to the hospital, by this stage my heart was in my throat! Although I was trying to be brave as my 21 mth old was with us and I thought breaking down and screaming hysterically was probably not the best course of action. So trying not to do the above, I bundled my now screaming 11wk old and very tired, grumpy 21mth old into the car and went to hospital....hope there's no policemen or women reading this as I sped along the road hitting every red traffic light there was and every roundabout had a 2 mile cue...not quiet but you know what I mean.
Anyway got to the hospital handed over letter from doctor, (stu had joined me by this point having rushed off the bus to the stop outside hospital) and to my surprise they told me the children's assessment ward was closed!!!!!! How can it be closed I asked, staff shortages came the reply. Well we were disgusted!! How can it be closed???
But they said as we had come they would try and find us a bed and see our son... very nice of them... to you know do their job... in their defense its not their fault its the government who is to blame but anyway, they took some blood. This was the most horrid thing I've ever seen they don't use a needle like they would with us they put a tube in and squeezed the blood a drop at a time from my poor sons hand, that they bent right back, he screamed so much and there was so many people round the bed he was on, I couldn't get to him only put my hand in to stroke his other hand. I thank God he was ok and they let him come home after the blood tests came back fine. My deepest empathy goes out to any parent who has a sick child in hospital. I was there for 3 long hours and they were awful. I wish kids didn't get sick it was horrid walking round the ward seeing so many. I just really pray that I will never be in that situation again.

WELL SO FAR shes not coming home!!!! Sob sob!!!
PLUS mean woman ate poor skippy or so she told said child!! I mean its one thing to eat him but to tell a child that he/she has just partaken in the worst horror story since someone told their child they had just eaten Bambi!!! IS SHOCKING!!!!
I am appalled, and will not let you near my children when you come home if you tell them stories like that they will have nightmares or not have a clue what your on about seeing as they are only 10wks and 21mths!
I'm SHOCKED!!!

PAULA 's COMING HOME!!!!!!!!!!!I'm so excited!!
Easter was great, Faith got three eggs I "helped" her eat two of them (the other was nestle...oh cadbury's rules) I have eaten enough creme eggs to feed a small country (i'm not joking, can eat 6 in one sitting) so diet is going well not! If I was aiming to look like a creme egg diet would be fine, but as I'm aiming for greek goddess don't think I'll achieve that anytime soon. Although will have to start trying as Paula is coming home and will want to go out partying so must be able to a) keep up with her on dance floor b) TRY to look as good as her (so thin and gorgeous humm....) and c) have enough cash to go out so not spend it on creme eggs (mental note to self :resist creme eggs)
Anyway have to find pic of hubby as his mate wants to laugh at him will take some today and post in the future.
Laters...(so stolen)

Just another quick note to say I love my friend Charlie she's fab!!! and Paula come home SOON I need big hugs!!!I miss tea and random rantings over Harry Potter and huge plot discrepancies in Lord of the Rings PLEASE PLEASE don't stay in Oz forever they don't deserve you plus I need my Paula fix am almost detoxed!!!